The Oscar Ceremony: The “Show” Has Been Sucked Right out of the Business

This weekend marks the 83^rd annual Academy Awards ceremony. I don’t remember when I began watching the Oscars telecast, but I can tell you that I have not missed a show since. And, I continue to watch every year despite the fact that my choices rarely win, many of my favorite films don’t even get nominated, and, well. . .the show itself has become as dull as watching paint dry. It wasn’t always so. Years ago—before the Academy adopted an official dress code and before current director Don Mischer decided that viewers would rather see badly performed songs than clips from movies—the ceremony was an entertaining combination of strange or inappropriate acceptance speeches, ridiculous production numbers, decent jokes from the emcee, and a sincere sentiment for Hollywood royalty of the past. I compiled a list of moments from past Oscar shows to give you an idea of what they used to be like. I sigh for the old days!

1. Each year, some pundit complains that the Oscar show runs too long. Too long for what? People are watching them from the comfort of home or at a party; they can always turn the channel or leave. The Superbowl runs about 6 hours, and half of that consists of endless instant replays of moments viewers have already seen, and no one complains about that.

Well, believe it or not, in 1959, the Oscars ran short by 20 minutes. The show was hosted by half-dozen stars that night, including Jerry Lewis. Lewis was tapped to fill the extra time at the end of the show, which he did by pulling Dean Martin onstage, ad libbing some schtick with Martin, and then rounding up the night's winners to dance and sing onstage. Lewis was supposedly furious at the director, who had been hurrying people through their intros and speeches all night. Though wildly uneven, the show was anything but dull. I doubt James Franco and Anne Hathaway could wing it for 20 minutes. 

2. If you haven’t seen the opening number to the 1988 ceremony, in which Brat Pack star Rob Lowe sang and danced with Disney’s Snow White, I doubt you will find it on Youtube, because Disney would likely sue them. The Mouse House tried to sue the Academy for copyright violation, among other reasons, the next day after the 1988 ceremony aired, but the suit was eventually dropped. The ceremony was directed by Allan Carr that year, who had given the world Grease and Can’t Stop the Music. He injected an element of camp into all the production numbers, which made the best song performances and other musical numbers worse than today’s counterparts—if you can imagine that.

            Viewers were completely vexed as to why Carr would ask Lowe to be part of the number. Not only was he not a singer, but he had barely survived a scandal in which he was caught on tape having sex with a young woman.  Watching Lowe twirl Snow White around on the dance floor, including a move in which she sits on his lap, seemed downright lewd. But, for me, I was confounded by the choice of song for Snow White and Rob Lowe--“Proud Mary.” What?

3. The single most touching moment on the Oscars occurred in 1972 when Chaplin received the Honorary Award for "the incalculable effect he has had in making motion pictures the art form of this century." Chaplin had lived in Switzerland since the 1950s, when fall-out from the McCarthy era branded the world’s greatest comic actor a subversive, and he was not allowed to return to the U.S. He came out of exile for the first time to receive the award. A selection of clips effectively detailed his career: Young viewers who had never seen any of his films saw a hint of the artistry that made him a legend. After the clips, the lights came up as he stepped out onstage to the longest ovation in Academy history—12 minutes. Chaplin was crying; famous stars from all eras were crying; I was crying.

            For decades, clips of films from the past were the norm, allowing young viewers the opportunity to see the work of past legends, but no longer. If Chaplin were to receive the award today, there would be no clips of his films, and the Little Tramp would be seated in the audience and asked to stand for a minute as his name was read with the same fanfare reserved for the technical awards. But, hey, director Don Mischer—whose background includes directing those memorable Super Bowl half-time shows—assures us that no one wants to see clips from old movies at the Oscars. Instead, he’s making more time this year for performances of those best song nominees that go over so well.

4. I could do an entire blog post on Cher and the dresses she has worn to the Academy Awards, many of them designed by costumer Bob Mackie. During the 1980s and early 1990s, Cher pushed the Academy’s buttons by wearing revealing ensembles, with outrageous accessories. Provocative but glamorous, she still radiated charisma. Gossip columnists insisted she wore the costume shown at the top of this post because she had been snubbed by the Academy for her performance in Mask. She quipped to reporters, “I did receive my Academy booklet on how to dress like a serious actress.'' A few years later, the Academy became tougher in their guidelines for appropriate attire—in part because of Cher’s antics.

5. My last example preceded my years of Oscar-watching, and, truth be told, it may be apocryphal. But, if the story isn’t true, then it should be, because it speaks to the way that losers must keep a strong upper lip instead of letting their true feelings show after Hollywood’s most coveted award eludes them.

            In 1945, the ceremony was held at Grauman’s Chinese Theater, where winners were called to the stage to receive their awards. Billy Wilder and his film noir Double Indemnity were up for several awards that year, and their main competition was Going My Way, directed by Leo McCarey. The latter is a sentimental tale of a priest, played by Bing Crosby, who presides over a church in a poverty-stricken parish. It is the exact opposite in tone and theme from Wilder’s cynical story of betrayal and lust. That evening, Wilder fumed as McCarey won Best Director and Frank Butler and Frank Cavett won Best Screenplay. When the big moment came, and Going My Way won Best Picture, Wilder couldn’t contain himself. As McCarey (the producer) trotted down the aisle to pick up his award, Wilder stuck out his foot and tripped him!